Death to the Ego (and Self-Sabotage)
As discussed in the 12 lessons of psycho-cybernetics, we are goal oriented mechanisms. We thrive from achievement as it adds value and meaning to our lives. A goal that looks unattainable (or is unfamiliar) can cause the ego to freak out which floods the mind with self-defeating thoughts. This is due to the very threat it imposes upon the ego when it shifts from the ‘known’ to the ‘unknown’.
This to me is ‘death to the ego’ as it implies death to its current (or previous) way of thinking. While the words signify destruction its really more of a gentle shift. This shift frees us from internal conflict and resistance, as we transition from the ego to our higher self as our primary source of guidance. This occurs when we surrender to the ego, for it’s in the surrendering that allows for our higher self to take over. When this happens, the ego takes a back seat and the two work interchangeably in harmony.
Have you ever found yourself knowing what to do but unable to follow through with doing it? Why do you suppose that is?
Embracing the inner child…
I see the inner child as a primary source of self-sabotage. We all have this inner child that was either scared, hurt, lacked love, felt misunderstood, was controlled or suppressed. Until these things are healed with the inner child, we continue to experience a disconnect between the adult self and our inner child. This disconnect triggers the inner rebellion which is associated to the ego. While the ego attempts to control things it also resists any form of control and change from the ‘known’. So trying to force the self to do something, for many people, triggers massive stress and anxiety leading them to doing the opposite.
One method that worked well for me to get past self-sabotage, was by surrendering to my ego and embracing my inner child to mend that disconnect. This disconnect is what impacts our ability to feel at deeper levels and clouds our intuition. When love unites the inner child with our adult self, we experience oneness within. The following visualization exercise will help connect you to your inner child.
This visualization is like creating a mental movie where you’re creating at the level you’re able to visualize and feel. Drop into your heart and be playful and creative with this process while you coach yourself through it. Start by embracing silence for a few minutes and then visualize yourself going within to connect to your inner child. Visualize you (your adult self) going within to embrace your younger self. If you’re not able to find your inner child, it comes to you as you surrender to it. So call upon it and then let go in love. We surrender by releasing, which takes practice so be patient with yourself and practice-practice-practice. As you find your inner child, visualize yourself hugging and embracing your inner child with all of your being.
In this experience the older self unites with the younger self and a deep healing follows. We experience a sense of oneness within, resolving all internal conflict. Anytime you are triggered, surrender to it and it will quickly pass. What we resist, persists. Learn to be gentle with yourself as you remain mindful with your thoughts. Embracing silence is nearly crucial for understanding and growing through self-sabotage.
We release self-sabotage by embracing the inner child and surrendering to the ego.
Until next time,